Monday, August 29, 2011

Confession & Help

I have a confession to make to you...

NOTE: this is very long but I just need to get this off my chest....

I don't know if it has shown or not but for the last several months my heart just hasn't been in crafting or in all honesty much of anything.  I have just been floating along in a daze...doing what I must to get through.  I normally don't post a whole lot about my personal life cause well, I don't want to bore you.  If you recall in February I hosted a contest here about which wedding dress Amber ("Future DIL") chose after a day long dress search.   She and my oldest son were going to get married in September and yes, in October she told us she was pregnant (She had the baby in June.) but I'm getting ahead of myself.  I want and need to start at the beginning so you get the full picture.

My son and Amber started dating last year in late August/early Sept and a few weeks later told us she was pregnant.  We really liked her and thought she was a very sweet and nice person.  She at that time had a 5 month old little girl which I absolutely fell in love with.  She was a beautiful little girl that came to be a very important to our family.  Not wanting to pry we didn't ask many questions but welcomed them both into our family with open arms.  

Now my son didn't have a great job and he still lived with us and she didn't have much of a job either (part time waitress - living with her grandma part of the time and her parents the other part of the time) so they just saw each other when they could ~ weekends, before/after work, etc.  This went on through Christmas and into 2011.  During this time her Mom was REALLY on Ben (ds) to find a place to rent so they could move in together.  

In Feb. 2011 he got a decent job (2nd shift) that paid enough so he could afford to pay rent on a place in our town to cover all of the bills since she wasn't going to be contributing anything to the till.  Note I said "our" town.  Amber lived in a larger city about 30 miles away and the rent there was 40-75% higher so there was no way that he could afford to live there and pay all of the bills on his check alone.   Of course her grandma wasn't thrilled because a) it wasn't in her home town; b) it wasn't a house but a trailer; c) it wasn't "clean"; etc.  IMO just starting out it was actually a nice place....not a castle mind you but it wasn't a rat infested dive either.  

So, they move in the first of March and the trouble begins....  Living with grandma and/or parents & sister she never really had to take care of her little girl full time and found out how much work it really was. She also didn't feel she should have to cook, clean or vacuum the house, wash his clothing or dishes. She didn't like Ben working on 2nd nor did she like it when he came to see us or help dh at our farm. She also spent most of her free time at her parents or grandmas house.  Her excuse was she had things to "plan for the wedding".   Now, I don't want you to think I'm naive enough to think Ben was an angel...I know he wasn't/isn't.  But he was trying...he worked, he did his own laundry, he cooked for himself, he paid the bills, etc. 

Near the end of March (a mere 3 weeks later) dh drives by the trailer and sees Amber, her mom and grandma cleaning the place out - while Ben was at work!  He came home that night to an empty house....  There was a couch, chair, his dresser and the washer and dryer left and no much else.  It took her a week to move in and exactly 3 hours to move it all out!  Ben was in shock and tried to call/talk to her but she wasn't answering his calls.  In a few days she called and asked if he wanted to buy the couch, chair & washer (we bought them the dryer when they moved in), told him that he wasn't the father of her baby and it was over!!

I tell you I was devastated.  One day Amber, Ariana and the baby (yet to be born) are gone without a word.  Totally out of our life in an instant!  We have not seen or heard from them since.  It's like they all died, were kidnapped or ????  that very day. I don't care about Amber, we found out later that this is exactly what she did to the father of her first child and she is back living with and being supported and cared for by her grandma/parents.  It's those kids I miss terribly.  I am a "mother hen" type person... I love and care for kids, animals, etc. with all my being. I feel as if a part of my heart was ripped out and destroyed that day. I loved that little girl with all my being and anxiously awaited the baby with such anticipation.

I heard something this past weekend that made me realize that over the past several months I have been going through the stages of grief as if they had really died that day and I'm stuck at #4.
Five Stages Of Grief
1. Denial & Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining (skipped this step)
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

WHEW,  told you it was a long story ~ are you still with me????

Here is where I ask for your help....

I need help getting back on track.  I need something specific to do, a request, a problem to solve, a challenge, something to get my heart back into crafting again.   I thought the charm swap would do it.  While I really enjoyed it it just wasn't stamping and I just didn't get dirty enough - LOL!!

I am asking if you would please post a comment or e-mail me a specific project you'd like to see, maybe a challenge you'd like me to try, a product or technique you'd like to see, etc.   
I don't care, I'm up for anything...I need a spark to get me going again and I am asking you to be that spark. 

Thanks in advance my inky friends....


  1. So sad when babies and kids are involved..........
    Still thinking of a challenge for you, in the meantime just wishing you well.

  2. I bet the kids missed you as well. Sending my regards, and hope some crafting could help you.

    I would not mind seeing some stamping with metal foil as I have some but not done alot with it. I am trying to do difernt Christmas cards but am only getting on very slowly.

  3. Bet you feel a lot better for getting it all off your chest.
    How about some ideas to use pigment inks as we all use the distress ones but rarely use the pigment ones
    Take care
    Von x

  4. oh I am so sorry to hear this! and yes I stayed with you till the end..that was long...but so interesting that someone could be that heartless!!! I'm pregnant and I couldn't imagine "tricking" someone like that...those poor kids :( I'll put my thinking cap on for something for you to do...I do love your tutorials so I'll try to think along those lines :) chin up we all love you in blog land!

  5. The pitfalls of being a nice, caring soul...I feel for you Ronie, & I know you don't believe it right now, but time does heal all wounds...In the meantime, what about an alphabet/technique ATC challenge to get both your brain & your hands working? I hope you find some consolation in your crafting, I know I'll be keeping my fingers & toes crossed for you & your son, cyberhugs from Vicky

  6. I am sending you are regular email too. One thing I would like to see is more ideas with just basic stamping supplies.. I dont have any of the distress or AI or tools like the blending stuff you speak about. I only have stamps, ink pads, a few reinkers, stickles-- in a few colors, and some UTEE and some fine Embossing powders..... lets see what you can come up with for just a feww supplies. I know there are others out there like me with just basic supplies. Love yas, R

  7. Roni, so sorry to hear about that. It's hard for us Mom's when we fall in love and have to let go. Such a terrible situation too. Have you checked out Neelz Expressionz, or Andy They're great for inspiration!

  8. Hi Roni

    This is a sad story. I bet you don't feel so well by now. I wish I could help you but really don't know what to ask for... Your tutorials are so interesting and different from what we see in other blogs. If I ever think of something I'll let you know.

    I hope for you to get over all this pretty soon.

    Have a nice week.

  9. Oh my dear, I'm so sorry. In your heart the chilldren became your grandchildren, and you love them unconditionally. Something similar happened to me too, and it was a long time before I could see a child who reminded me of the lost relationship without crying. I finally figured out that love is never wasted on a child. It also benefits you as well, but the pain is just the price we have to pay. It'll slowly get better--I won't kid you, it takes time.
    May I suggest a project around creating an art journal. I've been too chicken to start one. Maybe you can give us a starting point and ideas about what goes in. I know it's silly, but I'm afraid of ruining a page, which will then ruin the journal. Please don't laugh too hard--some of us are really inhibited!
    Hang in there. This is life's furnace smelting us into the best selves we can be. Sucks don't it?

  10. Roni -

    How tragic for your family! You poor son, he must be devasted! I know it hurts, but glad it happened now before they married. It would have been so much more difficult. I know you have such a kind heart and I can understand the grief you must be going through. I feel so sorry for those children, what a sad life for them. Please know that I am thinking of you and your family.
    AS for something to keep you busy, hmm let's see. How about a mixed media project, perhaps a shadowbox with a scene inside it. Like a mermaid under the sea, or circus scene with clowns, lions, etc. And how about making some of the parts movable? Just a thought.


    Elaine Allen

  11. I am speechless. I am so very sorry! What a tragedy! My thoughts are with you and your family. They don't know how lucky they were!

    How about beeswax. I see it's all the go. I just bought a melting pot and beeswax and UTEE. I also bought an 8x10 canvas, and I have in my head what I want to do, but do I paint it? Ink it? then attach my images? Another Perfect Pearls demo.


  12. Roni, I am so sorry that you are going through this. I know how it feels, though I haven't been through the exact same situation, it does involve kids and grandkids!
    I love all of the spray inks, and have been creating backgrounds with them to use in my mixed media...even digital. I scan them and go from there. I always enjoy any new products or techniques with spray or alcohol inks.

  13. Sorry to hear about your troubles. I hope you feel better soon and get back into the swing of things. Kids are such heart tuggers!

    I have a challenge....what the heck can I do with grungepaper besides flowers??? I've had this stuff forever and have barely touched it. Get busy!! :):)

  14. First, I am so sorry that happened to your family. A loss of any kind, regardless of the reason, is always tough. Your heart will heal with time. Treat yourself as you would your best friend in the same situation. :)

    All the previous posters have some great ideas for projects... the beeswax jumped out at me cause Ive bought some recently but havent done anything with it. It'd be fun for us to all figure it out together!

  15. At one time I found that I needed some creative thinking and forced deadlines to make me create whether I wanted to or not. I decided to an alphabet challenge for myself. I made up a list of inspiration words that were either products, techniques, thoughts or objects for each letter of the alphabet (6 times through). Then my challenge was to work in order of the alphabet and create some art every single day. I posted on my blog so I was accountable. This project took me 6 months to complete 6 times through the alphabet and I had some wonderful projects as well as a few weird ones.

    All of them were not stamping - in fact I let myself create in any medium that struck my fancy.

    Blessings on you and your family.

  16. Roni, I'm heartbroken for you. I had a lose simliar and after three years i'm still in the angry stage. My prayers are with you.

    How about stamping on fabric, impression stamping, or how about make and teach a sample book of techniques.

  17. Roni, I'm heartbroken for you. I had a lose simliar and after three years i'm still in the angry stage. My prayers are with you.

    How about stamping on fabric, impression stamping, or how about make and teach a sample book of techniques.

    FYI: I resent the email.

  18. Sorry to hear all you've been through. So hard to invest heart and soul into something and then have it turn out the way it did.

    If you want a project, why not join in the Gingersnap Creations Magnet swap. It's all about Encouraging Words which might be nice to get and give :)

  19. Roni~ words cannot convey the hurt that I feel for you and your family. That girls parents must not have souls to let their daughter carry on that way and to let their grandkids get attached to people only to be ripped from their lives.
    I really do love all the ideas your faithful followers have come up with so far. I too would love some new ideas for the melt art product line and I would love to have you teach us to do a domino book (maybe a steampunk one!) I know I'm being greedy but I really would love for you to get your groove back and if that takes us making demands on you than by jove I will demand it!
    Take care and know that we really are here for you. You put the Ink in Ink Stains;)

  20. Sweet Roni...
    You and your dear family are in my are lovely people and what you do in this life is with honorable purpose. You will all rise above this tragedy.
    I believe we are given these dark hours to strengthen us, because there's something else intended for us ~ a mission if you will.

    I would love to see a challenge with beeswax. I have my materials but they tend to just sit in the closet!

    P.S. I mentioned you and the charm swap on my blog this morning!

  21. Unfortunately there are a lot of people out there who want to live off someone else and as soon as they find out they need to actually do work they bolt.

    If you're looking for a meaningful project I am a MOD over at a site, (Massive Act of Pony Kindness) It's a site that looks to bring a little happiness into the lives of people going through hardships. It's generally geared towards people who collect My Little Ponies, but I make cards to send to people. It's always nice to just get a little something in the mail when you're feeling bad. Feel free to stop on over if you are interested!

  22. Very sorry for all of you....that was a very cruel and evil game to play with other people's hearts.....wishing your son finds the loveliest gal.
    How about a something (perhaps a canvas)that expresses your hopes for his future.

  23. :O( I, too have some holes in my heart that don't seem to fill back up. I'm thinking about making a deck of "spirit cards" - ATC sized cards altered front and back, to express the unhappiness and encourage lifting my spirits with more hopeful emotions. On one side an emotion that pains me, on the other an emotion I'd like to replace it with, for example, 'Sadness' represented on one side and 'Joy' on the other. Thinking of how I can represent both the positive and..more painful emotions is kinda cathartic. I've thought how nice it would be to do a collaboration with other artists and end up with a deck of 'Spirit cards' full of artwork from many others who need to release or express some feelings, but I'm not much of an organizer. :O) Feel better.

  24. So sorry to hear of your loss. It really is a loss of two grandchildren. How can people like that even look themselves in the mirror each day! I would love some beeswax or UTEE projects but also really enjoyed your Mother's Day project you did and still haven't completed mine. I did finally start the first arch page.

  25. I'm sorry for your loss. I usually make something for my family for Christmas. Its been fudge, knitted wash clothes, knitted scarves etc. This year I decided to make a assorted box of cards for each family and if you would like to help me I need ideas for a year of cards.
    My thoughts are with you and I know you will come through this.

  26. my heart aches for you and your son..your whole family..sorta glad she is out of his life..not a very nice person at all...but the pain of it all...sending you an email as well...and sending up some prayers too

    xo cher

  27. So sad to hear your story Roni and feel sorry for those dear children. I love all your work and enjoy seeing new techniques for you as well. I would love to see ways to use vintage images!!

  28. I'm so sorry for you and your family, my thoughts and prayers are with all of you. There are already some great idea's posted here for you, I would love to see you make a nice ATC tutorial of some sorts followed with a swap. Love and hugs Lydia Doorman

  29. So sorry to hear this. You are such a kind person and I know your heart is broken. I'll email you some ideas.

  30. Oh Roni, so sad to hear your family has been going through all this. Emailing you personally, but in the meantime I am hoping to inspire you a bit by requesting that you show us how to use small stamps in creative ways. I have loads of really tiny, unmounted stamps of random images that I cannot, for the life of me, figure out how to use! Help! If anyone can tackle this, it's you! Oh yes, and maybe show a project or two using fabric and stamping?
    Hugs and prayers for you.

  31. Hi
    I feel for you because I have been through depression too, and I got to the stage when I just couldn't see the point of making stuff, but making stuff is what got me around again. I used to teach embroidery and crafts and having to give that up was a part of the depression.
    I have some very good friends who MADE me start monthly workshops for them. The fact that I had to make samples, had to write out instructions as they insisted on paying me and I couldn't let them down, gradually pulled me around.
    So I think you too might benefit from doing something similar.
    I also want to say that I have only recently got into making art charms. I have no money as dh and myself are on a reduced pension due to him being made redundant two years ago at the age of 61. Finding your blog was like finding the pot of gold. Your tutorials are great.
    I've had two operations on my hand in the last 6 wks so can't craft at the moment, but your blog has spurred me on to collect supplies ready for when I can get back to making stuff.
    You just have to keep plugging away, and remember there is a point to creating, and there are hundreds like me who look on your blog as a saviour to sanity.So thank YOU for YOUR support when I needed it.


  32. I feel terrible about what happened to you and your son. I'm glad you wrote us about it. I hope you and your son are able to cling to each other for strength to get through this time.
    Sylvia from Minnesota

  33. Morning this is Julie from the UK.
    I totally understand how you are feeling Roni.It is heart wrenching when something like this happens, but you have come a long way to share your worries and everyday will heal small parts of your heart. Its good that you have your passion and drive(craft) to fall back to. Its helped me in many times of worry! Every morning I wait for your page to load and you never fail to inspire me!!
    A new project???? How about another FAB book for tecniques? We would all be fighting for a copy over here and thats a fact!

  34. Hi Roni, so sorry to hear about what has happened. I can understand why you are feeling such a sense of loss, and am so sad for you and your Son.
    Beeswax projects, stamping on fabric, or a techniques book are all fabulous ideas, as have been mentioned by previous commenters.
    I love poppping over to your blog, and hope that you can keep going through this, we would all miss you terribly.
    A big hug from the UK, Judith xx

  35. That tinks. It always hurts when a cild is ripped from your life. Been there. I always find it helps if I take my pain and focus on someone else that may have it worse. There is a lady that was effected by the recent hurricase shabbychic101 on youtube that lost pretty much everything from what I understand. There are a couple ladies on youtube auctioning off lots of goodies to raise money for her. Crafters are a pretty close group of folks. Perhaps you could make a few things and auction them for someone in need. Just a thought. It always helps me to refocus. I will say a prayer for you and for those children. If she continues in this pattern they are going to go thru what you are now going thru for the rest of heir childhood and thats really sad.

  36. Roni, I feel for you and your family. You are right in that it is just like grief and I'm glad you shared with us.
    Now for a challenge, I loved the Gothic Arch book (still not finished but that's another story) and would love another book. I like the suggestion of using small stamps in collage. I have a few myself that I thought would be good in collage but have never used them successively. Lots of ink to get those fingers dirty.

  37. I can understand the grief and longing you must be going through and I bet you have to be strong for your son and you have been feeling miserable for a long time. That being said, I am one of your "lurkers" although I am a follower. The reason I like your blog so much is that you present so many good ideas and techniques and truthfully, I am lacking in skill. I would love to see some projects that use some of the newer paper lines (think Tim Holtz) in a different and creative way, that could be a mini album, a book or some sort of journal and if you could incorporate some of your favorite techniques into the project in an instructional way, that would be great!

  38. So sorry to read about your sadness. It really brings the creative inclination onto a downer any such trauma and it's so hard when children are involved. Hoping time and art will help to heal your heart.

    As for a challenge:- How about a mixed media journal for the season/months of the year. That can incorporate all those mediums that you love best and some that are new or new to you.
    Take care
    Karin xx

  39. What a low life piece of crap she is. You know what, one day she will get what she deserves and you, and your son, are well rid of her. It's the children I feel sorry for. I totally understand how you feel. How anyone can be so heartless is beyond me but it shows what kind of a person she truly is. Her children have one hell of a role model don't they?

    I always have a problem making a card using alcohol ink backgrounds. I can't do it unless I take the paper and glue it to a card front because when I'm making the background, the ink spills over the edges. Maybe you have a trick to doing a folded card and NOT having the ink ooze over the edges? Also, a project for you which would be great for us.....maybe you could do an on line booklet picking techniques you've posted in the past, or new techniques, and post them every day. We could print them, save them, and have them for reference.

    I would love to be able to make you feel better but that has to happen for you in time. A thought, think of how much worse this would have been for you and your son if piece of crap had hung around for years and then did this. This is bad, that would have been worse. Something to be glad about? There's an up side to everything. Maybe, although you're devastated about this whole thing, the upside is that your son is not stuck with a blood sucking, lazy a@@ed person who uses people for what she can get from them. As I said before, it's the kids I feel sorry for. They're stuck with her forever and unfortunately, they may turn out just like her. Kids learn what they see. Let's hope not. Hang in there....better days are coming...they always do. When we think we can't get through something horrible like this, somehow we do. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

  40. Roni - I think you have the right idea of immersing yourself in a project. A book of techniques would be awesome! On a smaller scale, I would like to create a frame on a mirror with irridescent polymer clay tiles (mosaic). I love alcohol inks and have been thinking of incorporating Perfect Pearls or Pearl Ex to get the sheen. Any ideas? Wishing you peace and strength.

  41. Roni--I'd love to see some jewelry crafts. Do you do metal stamping? I'd love to know a bit more about what I must have/buy to do that. Or the basics of making a bracelet, with beads...nothing too complicated.

    One question...'she' says the baby is not your son's she lying? If she is lying then that is your grand baby and you have rights as grandparents. You may want to exercise those rights.

    If she is telling the truth you and your son are lucky to be rid of her...but those poor children.
    Not only will they suffer, they are the future of this country and the whole country therefore suffers.

  42. I commend you for asking for help and sharing your story. I read your blog as soon as it comes out, you always inspire me. Sad thing is, I have never one time shared with you how much I LOVE your tips, tricks, and inspirational ideas. How sad. I apologize for that. So, THANK YOU!!! Quick suggestion to you- check out It's something I passionately invest my time into. The program and children NEED people like you involved. It may help heal your heart while you help a child in need. (Just a thought)

    I find myself totally engrossed in projects that you demonstrate inks, glimmer mists, perfect pearls etc... That's what inspires me. I love your projects and advice. So, if you have any (even basic) tips and ideas you would like to share using inks, solvents, glues, etc... that's what I would love to read.


  43. oh you poor thing. the bright side (i am a real pessimist so have been forcing myself to look on the bright side which i find really irritating but much better for my health) is that this Amber tramp would have made your life and DS lives miserable. the pain/anger/depression will lift. so a challange - i need inspiratin, i haven't stamped all summer. only scrapped 2 or 3 pages. i'm in a funk for no good reason. i want some cards to send , halloween, Christmas, EAster, thinking of you, -Elegant, lovely , vintage cards without a lot of 3D embellies cuz of the mailing hassle. i also want MAN cards, they are the hardest. i'll be thinking of you, thanks for sharing.i love your blog, always learn something

  44. So sorry to hear about the loss of your creative urge due to family upheaval. Maybe someday you will be able to see the kids again. I would like to see Asian inspired art or technique based art with basic tools/supplies. Hope you start to feel creative soon.

  45. Roni, I'm so sorry for you and your family I don't understand what makes people stoop to such deception. I really feel sorry for her children; they're missing out not having you and your family in their lives. My heart goes out to you.

    God bless you and your family. May He walk with your family through this valley and "bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair." - Isaiah 61:3

  46. Roni, I offer my heart felt best wishes for you. I lost my last aunt in July and my brother just this past week, so I can completely relate to the over whelming feelings of loss. It doesn't all feel real yet. My way of working through grief, sadness, etc. has always been through my art. So I just keep plugging along. And then I remind myself to use my best stuff first and try everything. That's when I throw away all the rules and try things I have been putting on hold. From my perspective, any form of grief reminds us of our own mortality, the things we have done and the things we have left undone. My thoughts are with you, and my heart too.

  47. I have been waiting and wondering when the baby was going to arrive an all that. Its tough but at least Ben will have a fresh start in ways. He loses so much but also won't have as much of a curvable trying to provide for a family all at once.
    Wow look at all these comments, you are so loved!

  48. Your son is still young. This has been a heartwrenching lesson and that is part of having to be a child/adult. It is never easy. It is far easier for all to have happened before the baby. He only needs to be responsible for himself and not for a loveless woman. The baby is in the for the long haul but it is not your responsibility. This is life and life keeps us on our toes and appreciates the goodness when it comes our way. I have so many products that I become disallusioned with ideas. I am always amazed with your creativity! I think you are awesome in your field. You have many "friends" and you are fortunate to have us in your life and vice versa.

  49. wow, so many great replies. I am so sorry to hear about this situation but also, glad that you shared it. Even after all this time, there is such a stigma around grief. I hope that some of these wonderful ideas will help you! I'm also in a rut but interested in making something for halloween that is useful... I get hung up on doing crafts for "no reason". As if our mental health wasn't reason enough! ;) Hang in there sweet lady! One day you will have a daughter in law and grandkids that truly appreciate you!

  50. How awful for you all, and especially for your son.
    I recently went through a 'bad time' myself and spent all my time hiding up in my summerhouse - no phone no internet! What got me going again was looking at other stampers work (and keeping up my DT work which was hard). I've started slowly just making birthday cards, but in styles I enjoy. My next step is to enter a couple of challenges - but again only those I enjoy. I find having something specific in mind helps (bit like your idea really).
    Sending you love. xx

  51. I just recently came across your blog and became a follower. Your creativity is so absolutely awesome. The pain you are going through brought tears to my eyes. I've been in a similar situation, and what you are going through will eventually be easier to deal with. Sharing this with all these people who care about you is definitely a start in the healing and emotional cleansing process - kudos to you for being able to do this. The loss of children you care for is devastating. I also suspect that you )are deeply hurting for you son also. (When my ex-dil caused my son such deep pain, I hurt for him. I prayed for God to take this grief from my son's heart - it was awful to see him hurt so badly. It may not seem so at this time, but it is probably better that things happened now, because she would have brought greater pain to your son and the family on down the road.
    I loved the charms, and you have inspired me to start making them. As for future projects, anything you design will be wonderful - so just surprise us!

  52. You're a wonderful person, Roni, and an excellent artist. It's terrible to experience this loss, but honestly, you and your son were incredibly lucky. You had a close call with that sick family. There may be nothing you can do now for the children except wish them well. But you did provide them, as someone noted above, with much needed love. I would never mind WHY it happened, you can think about that later if you want. Right now you're right to immerse yourself in art, and I vote for fabric embellishments --gooey stuff on fabric is interesting, or fabric in unexpected combinations --with metal, with beeswax, with glass. Sending you love and light, Roni, knowing you'll find many outlets for your love.

  53. I hope each day makes things easier for you after such a terrible experience. Be positive and think that, except for losing access to the children, maybe your family are well rid of her. One day she will reap as she sews.
    I think the idea from Peace is wonderful to make a set of Spirit cards with positive affirmations. Don't make the task too daunting and just start with a 1st set of say 10 than we could move on to another set.
    I hope life and people treat you and your family kinder in the future. Somewhere there is a beautiful kind girl who will make your son very happy and forget all this.
    Love jo x

  54. Thinking of you from Dartmouth Nova Scotia, it's hard and takes time but the sun will shine in your heart again, and the fact that you accepted the gf with an open an loving heart says a lot about who you are. Now it's time to help your son heal and to begin to heal yourself, we are never given more than we can handle and at this time there is probably only one pair of footsteps in the sand, He will always carry you through the tough times.
    Hugs from me and my kitties

  55. Wow- that is a situation that would be hard to deal with- Bless you! I hope your son is OK too! Will he ask her for a paternity test to make sure it is not really his baby??? Ok on to stamping.....I would love to see more use for the Mica Pads- I never use them...I love the mist technique- I bought the stamp cleaner to use with the reinkers.... I want to learn using journal pages- what kind of paper to use or journal to buy and using more distress techniques.....

  56. So sorry to hear about what you have been through the last few months.They must a heartless family
    to do this to your family.
    Time does heal all wounds.
    Would love to do a Christmas charm swap.Also an altered book,anything using beewax,and atc swaps.
    hugs Helen

  57. My heart goes out to you and your family. You must be hurting so much. Please take care and stay positive Roni.

  58. I'm so sorry for both you and your son but you will see, hopefully soon, that every black cloud has a silver lining and her moving out when she did will be part of that. Hopefully, this will be a wake-up call for your son as it is a very hard lesson learned...

    As for projects, art is therapeutic and I think it would be great for you to work through the 5 Stages of Grief with your art. Do them in order and take as much time as you need for each project, as each person is individual in how long it takes them to go through each stage "in real life." You should find that by the end of your art sessions you will feel better and have some really great art to show for it!

    Then, shop it around and get it published in an Art Magazine, that will really provide awesome closure!


  59. I'm so sorry to hear about your challenges. What about creating a little project for yourself of processing these feelings of grief and loss through your art? You don't need to share this with anyone and just let it be for your own healing.

    I'd like to see projects using Moon Glow sprays (or other similar brands) and how to combine these with rubber stamping.

    I'd also like to see some ideas on creating embellishments that aren't flowers and jewels. I'm addicted to using these, but sometimes would like other embellishment options. I like the idea of using paper clay or something similar but haven't yet tried this.

  60. I am so sorry you are having a hard time. I took part in your swap some months ago and believe you are a kind and inspiring lady. In fact just the other night I had your art book by my bed. I find something new every time!

    Keep smiling and you will see the sun.x

    I would love to see some embossing projects too! x

  61. I know that grief is just as real as when I lost my husband on his way to work shortly before Christmas, making his funeral the day before Christmas eve. Three months later our house was burnt down by my oldest sons former friend (someone we took in to help) but he started on drugs. 5 months later, my company closed it's doors on our facility - making me jobless. 4 months after that I was informed by my oldest son that his girlfriend was pregnant. Do you see a trend? Jobless, homeless, no belongings, no husband????? Well people used to ask how I was making it. I informed them that I woke up breathing the next morning, although I wouldn't have given a darn if I hadn't. 8 1/2 years later I am now 47 and here to tell you that things will get better. Best way - laughing, at yourself, at someone else! LAUGH - I cannot say that delving into crafts helped me because I have a lot of unfinished items and not much of a getgo. There is something you may be able to help me with - PROBLEM: I need to throw a baby shower and the theme is GNOMES - yes. Another long story...but Gnomes. Any ideas for party?

  62. What a terrible thing to happen to such a wonderful woman and her family! Her karma will come back on her, of that I'm sure! The babies would have been better off with you & your son then with her (even if they weren't blood)!!

    I feel we are all lucky, here in blogsville, to have you and your extreme talent! Thank you for sharing and having the faith is us to try to and help you. I hope some of these great ideas will inspire you! I love the idea of a technique book!!! If you choose that, I know there'll be one made in my house!

    Your blog friend!

  63. I am so sorry Roni. You are such a sweetie and it must really hurt. I didn't have time to read through all of the lovely supportive comments from everyone, so I don't know if someone already suggested this or not. But why don't you make a scrapbook or journal or shrine or something, dedicated to the little girl you lost. You don't even have to give it to her. It is mostly for yourself to heal. Add photos if you have them and add symbols of things she loved and activities you did together. You can let her know how much you miss her and how much you treasured your time together. It is something that would help me. It's just an idea. Take care. Love Cindy


Thanks for your thoughts and comments!